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I'm getting old. That's not exactly a news flash but I'm starting to notice things that I didn't before. I'm not just talking about the gray hair and the enlarged prostate; I'm noticing all kinds of things. Maybe it's just me, but the whole world just seems different.
For instance, lately I've noticed an inordinate amount of lettuce on fast food burgers. It seems that every time I eat a burger, about half a head of shredded lettuce falls out on my shirt. Don't get me wrong, I like a lettuce on my burger as much as the next guy, but with lettuce, much like quality time with your wife, more isn't necessarily better. Maybe it's just me.
Is it just me or is it really stupid to advertise prescription drugs on TV? Do people really call their doctor and ask for a specific medication because it seemed to help the guy on the commercial overcome some disease nobody's ever heard of? Do doctors actually write prescriptions on request?
For instance, lately I've noticed an inordinate amount of lettuce on fast food burgers. It seems that every time I eat a burger, about half a head of shredded lettuce falls out on my shirt. Don't get me wrong, I like a lettuce on my burger as much as the next guy, but with lettuce, much like quality time with your wife, more isn't necessarily better. Maybe it's just me.
Is it just me or is it really stupid to advertise prescription drugs on TV? Do people really call their doctor and ask for a specific medication because it seemed to help the guy on the commercial overcome some disease nobody's ever heard of? Do doctors actually write prescriptions on request?
Seriously, until I saw that commercial I thought RLS were my initials and not an abbreviation for Restless Leg Syndrome, and I don't know anybody who sits outside in bathtubs watching a sunset to enhance the romance in their marriage. Maybe I just don't get out much.
It could be just me but I think they're making pants a little smaller than they used to. I don't know if they're trying to cut costs by making the pants smaller or if Levi Strauss is secretly in business with Slim Fast, but over the last few years I've noticed it's getting tougher and tougher to fit into a pair of jeans with a 34 inch waist.
Has anybody else noticed that country music is turning into rock music and what passes for rock music is a bunch of angry kids making noise? I've never been a big country music fan but lately I've enjoyed a few CD's recorded by guys wearing cowboy hats.
I've always thought it was silly for grownups who are not cowboys to wear those silly hats and boots but I've come to realize it's no more ridiculous than some moron with spiked hair, a huge nose ring and a tattoo of a skull on his forehead screaming into a microphone. I miss ZZ Top.
It could be just me but I think they're making pants a little smaller than they used to. I don't know if they're trying to cut costs by making the pants smaller or if Levi Strauss is secretly in business with Slim Fast, but over the last few years I've noticed it's getting tougher and tougher to fit into a pair of jeans with a 34 inch waist.
Has anybody else noticed that country music is turning into rock music and what passes for rock music is a bunch of angry kids making noise? I've never been a big country music fan but lately I've enjoyed a few CD's recorded by guys wearing cowboy hats.
I've always thought it was silly for grownups who are not cowboys to wear those silly hats and boots but I've come to realize it's no more ridiculous than some moron with spiked hair, a huge nose ring and a tattoo of a skull on his forehead screaming into a microphone. I miss ZZ Top.
It's entirely possible that I missed a memo, but when did it become a requirement to be reachable by phone at all times? People have phones in their homes and businesses; they have them strapped onto their belts, in their purses and pockets and even on chains around their necks.
I've seen people talking on cell phones while driving, shopping, working and I even saw a guy making a call while using a public restroom (I just happen to notice ... it's not like I was looking at the guy ... oh, never mind). They actually had to pass legislation to keep people from using phones on airplanes for safety reasons.
It might be me but it sure seems like athletes, anchormen, judges and elected officials are getting younger all the time. I just can't get used to the idea that the next President of the United States might be younger than me.
I've seen people talking on cell phones while driving, shopping, working and I even saw a guy making a call while using a public restroom (I just happen to notice ... it's not like I was looking at the guy ... oh, never mind). They actually had to pass legislation to keep people from using phones on airplanes for safety reasons.
It might be me but it sure seems like athletes, anchormen, judges and elected officials are getting younger all the time. I just can't get used to the idea that the next President of the United States might be younger than me.
I've faced the fact that my doctor is younger than me and it doesn't even bother me that I have a kid who is about to turn 30 (don't worry Sarah, they don't know it's you), but the fact that a guy who is four years younger than me has risen to that level kind of highlights my underachievement.
It's not like I want to be president, I can publicly humiliate myself without having to wear a tie all of the time, but subconsciously I always wanted to be the first guy in my generation to have the power to ruin the economy and engage thermonuclear warfare.
Maybe we're ready for a president from my generation and maybe not. Maybe ice cream is really the cement that holds the universe together and Jimmy Buffett is the Beethoven of our time. Maybe women really are inexplicably attracted to short funny looking guys with a big nose and humped backs ... or maybe it's just me.
Rick Seley is a Fallon resident.
It's not like I want to be president, I can publicly humiliate myself without having to wear a tie all of the time, but subconsciously I always wanted to be the first guy in my generation to have the power to ruin the economy and engage thermonuclear warfare.
Maybe we're ready for a president from my generation and maybe not. Maybe ice cream is really the cement that holds the universe together and Jimmy Buffett is the Beethoven of our time. Maybe women really are inexplicably attracted to short funny looking guys with a big nose and humped backs ... or maybe it's just me.
Rick Seley is a Fallon resident.
